It was a chilly winter morning. I was quite nervous that day, and the chilly winds only added to it.
It was my first year of college. I was all prepared for the big day. After all it was the first inter-college singing competition of my life. I was participating for “solo light music” category. With the blessings of elders I left for college.
Normally, one would find it quite hard to even stand in the local buses during the morning hours. Luckily, I managed to get the window seat in the 543 DTC bus.
As I made myself pretty comfortable at the window seat, a sense of happiness and assurance filled me, that I could probably get some more time to memorize the lyrics of my song.
Though I had practiced the song a lot, rehearsing it in front of my teachers, and the singing society’s coordinator, yet I was not confident of the song .....rather…. myself!!!
What if I make a mistake on the stage?
What if I forget my lyrics?
I can’t let down the faith entrusted upon me by my teachers and colleagues…..
With all sorts of horrifying and discouraging questions boggling up my mind, I entered the college. As I made my way to the basement which was the “Abode of our college’s cultural society- THE HYPERIONS (as we call ourselves)”, I paused. I recollected myself, clearing my thoughts.
My friends greeted me, but one person from the crowd walked up to me with a charming smile on his face, and said “Hey Anu, don’t worry, everything’s gonna be fine”. This person was no other but our culsoc’s(cultural society’s) co-ordinator…Mr. Prashant Srivatsa...a person whom I adore the most from graduation….
That was the time I felt a sense of relaxation. My confidence level, all of a sudden touched its pinnacle.
I practiced one last time along with the guitarist.
Finally we packed our stuff and got ready to leave for our destination …….. “GARGI,DU”.
On reaching Gargi we learned that the competition which was supposed to be starting in another half an hour will take another 2 hrs. I was totally exhausted and vexed up by the rigorous practice sessions, so I thought to take a break and I diverted my mind to what the other members of my group were doing. They were having a gala time, not forgetting, a guitarist always plays the role of a saviour.... as he/she can always rescue people from boredom to real good music and entertainment!!
As we enjoyed the songs played by our guitarist……time flied away. Soon the competition was about to start.
Now yet again as the clouds of tension surrounded me, I soon learned a very shocking fact that this year Gargi has witnessed more than 60 participants.
Everyone in the culsoc were amazed at the figure….cos it was the first time Gargi witnessed such a large number of participants.
My fellow friends…tried to boost me up, but deep down their hearts as well as mine we knew the task has become more difficult than thought….and I hardly have any chances to win the competition.
All the time I had only one thing going on my mind…. “my chances of holding a rank in the top three….was impossible. That too an amateur like me who has had no training in music and who has no experience of performing in front of such large audience…..the game is over”.
I can recall each and every moment, as one by one the participants were coming on stage and gave their best….and then the entire hall would echo by huge roars of applauds.
I was so scared that I didn’t prefer to stay in that hall.
Had I been inside the hall, I surely would have had a nervous breakdown, I was so scared.
There was too much pressure on me…..not created by anyone else but by my own self…for the sake of rigorous practice sessions I had gone through, missing my classes for that day!
All that was there in my mind now was to perform really good, convincing myself with the fact that winning always was not so important. I was going to face a large audience. After all I don’t want to be dumbstruck on the stage, making a fool of myself.
As I waited for my turn, the tensioned prevailed.
Finally my name was called…..
I regained myself, chanting The Almighty’s name, I walked up to the podium. The Guitarist and I, we exchanged some glances, wished each other luck. That was the first time I was so close to a mike, I could feel it. I felt great holding it. As I adjusted the mike, I wondered if I can take a one quick look at the audience. I recalled individuals who had been with us in BITS, pilani’s annual fest …and then I saw my team members hooting up for me….
At that moment, taking a deep breath and with a forceful smile on my face I introduced myself :
“ Namaskar, main anuradha , P.G.D.A.V(M) ki chathra apke samne Ashaji dwara gaya hua geet “ Roz Roz Aankhon Tale” prasthut karney jaa rahi hun”.
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From that moment till I ended the song, I can hardly recall anything that was going on in my mind. All I can recall was that as I ended my song….the entire hall exploded with applauds which lasted for at least 30 sec’s.
I got off the stage and as I was taking my seat, I heard a voice from behind, I turned around with astonishment, the voice said “great voice, nice song”. Thanking him with a smirky smile I turned around and it didn’t take me long to realize he was the same person who qualified for the finals in BITS….and since then I had a serious crush on his voice. I was on the 9th cloud. And he, praising me was a very special moment for me…
My team members appreciated me for putting up a good performance…and then we all headed for the canteen as we were really very hungry. There were still 30 more participants to perform after which the group song competition would take place, and that could have easily taken 2 hrs….so we thought of filling our stomachs in the mean time.
While all that time, I knew and I convinced myself with the fact that with such talented and adept singers in front of me, who have sung some very good classical numbers, I held no chance.
So, cheering up myself with the thought that my performance and the applaud will indeed form an everlasting moment in my life, I geared up myself for the group song which we were about to perform……
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Just minutes before the results, our group occupied some seats…and waited for the results for the group song to be announced…because we had less hope of winning in solo singing…..
I knew I can’t make it, but Deep down some corner of my heart solemnly said, “there’s always a hope, after all my performance was not so bad …”
With these things running in my mind……the judges announced the third winner…it wasn’t me!!!......hopes weakened…..
I had crossed my fingers. They announced the second winner….it was some guy of another college….I lost all my hopes!!!
That’s set!!!
I had lost all hopes….I was depressed…..felt a big disappointment…..a failure…..I couldn’t hear anything…tears were about to roll down...when all of a sudden…I heard my name….coming from a distance …..echoeing in my ears…… I raised my head and before I cud realize what had happened , my team members jumped from their seats…..and lunged towards me….arms wide open!!!..
Hugging me, patting me!!!
It didn't take me long to interpret….what exactly happened!!!
I was thrilled…….and tears just rolled down my cheeks…..tears of happiness……..”YESSSSSS…….I MADE IT”……I was repeating it to myself!!!!!...... I recoiled in disbelief. The feelings…..it was a triumph :) ….i won a major battle there!!!!
I was declared the winner…….FIRST PRIZE!!!!
I lack words to describe my feelings at that particular moment.
November 11th, 2003……………..has been registered in my diary as one of the most memorable days of my life, which I would cherish till eternity!!!
From that day on…..there was no looking back…..i kept bagging prizes….
I had an opportunity to sing one last song during our college’s fest in final year….in which again bagged the first prize.
The song will forever remain close to my heart…”Roz Roz Ankhon Tale”…
Winning this competition, proved as a big turning point in my life. It boosted up my confidence level……and taught me “we cannot discover new oceans unless we have the courage to lose sight of the shore” ,and we too are indeed worth of all the good things in life!!!
